Thursday, July 31, 2008

Guest Blogger Report - Beautiful Women and President Madison

Good Afternoon, I'm very happy to announce a guest blogger report from a resident in the Village. I'm always encouraged to hear from other residents that would like to improve upon Arlington Village and know that they view the blog as a positive way to discuss the things that are happening in our community. Feel free to send items that you would like to see on the blog or send in reports about the things you deem important in the can find my email address listed on my profile page.

Guest Blogger Report.

Answering the call, I have tasked myself with investigating and reporting on the new security features in the laundry rooms. As many of you know, Arlington Village recently installed peepholes in the doors of laundry rooms. Herewith is my report.

Well, actually, I can’t speak to the installation of peepholes in all the laundry rooms - as I only went to one. But that one was a veritable font of information. And paramount among my findings was this: Arlington Village has the most beautiful women in the world.

Now, I already knew this. But it is nice to know that others share my opinion.
Although I happen to agree with the conclusions of Arlington Village Peephole Committee, dear reader, I’m compelled to remind you that it is not my opinion expressed here, but a detailed analysis of the opinions of the Arlington Village Peephole Committee rendered by careful study of the peephole in, well, one laundry room. The most beautiful women in the world, and I couldn’t agree more.

Let me explain:

The peephole measures 62 inches from the floor.

The average woman’s overall height measures 63.7 inches from the floor (5’3.7”).

The average woman’s eye measures 59.4 inches from the floor.

The average distance between the average woman’s eye and the top of her head measures 4.1 inches.

Now, to the untrained eye, this would appear that the peephole is too high for the average woman; and I too, was stumped.

Until I remembered that the women of Arlington Village are NOT average. They’re beautiful. Like Miss America! And lo’ and behold, the average height of Miss America is 5’6 ½”. Making her eye height ½” higher than the peephole. Perfect for leaning forward and peeping.

So be safe all you beautiful women of Arlington Village as you do your laundry. Were James Madison, our fourth President, doing his laundry… Well, he was only 5’4”, weighed 100 lbs, and probably not strong enough to open the laundry room door.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Very time I go to the laundry room I'll have to bring a measuring tape...perhaps we are among Amazons.